Confessing My Sins of Omission: Silence Isn't Always Golden

... my journey as a Christian American and why conflict avoidance doesn't work and party affiliations can't be our north star

“There is a time to speak and a time to keep silent.” —Ecclesiastes 3:7

Photo by Shaira Dela Peña on Unsplash

I’m usually pretty quiet when it comes to politics. And I’m a big ol’ chicken when it comes to conflict.

This combination often renders me silent. And sometimes silence is interpreted as agreement. And, ironically, this approach to conflict-avoidance usually results in more conflict and not less. Usually, it’s my interior life that suffers the most. My failure to speak up almost always signals an inaccurate message, and then I feel misunderstood and resentful.

Maybe you resonate with this? Maybe you understand? Maybe it’s time to use our voices?

This is a unique moment.

There is a time to speak and a time to keep silent, and it would be unfaithful for me to keep silent now.

“If I were to remain silent, I'd be guilty of complicity,” said Albert Einstein.

I’m no Einstein, but I’m not willing to be complicit in the erosion of compassion, responsibility, humanity, hope, and love in America.

Some of you will disagree with me, and I’m okay with that. Maybe we can have coffee or go for a walk and talk together and listen to one another. I would welcome that.

Some will write me off, or try to attach a label. Okay, but I hope you’ll hear me out.

Some people will resonate with these words because our experiences are similar. I hope you find support and solidarity in what I'm saying. We're not alone. We may be quiet, but we are not alone. Right now, our voices matter. Our voices and our votes matter.

This is both testimony and confession:

I grew up in a family of lifelong Republicans, where political conversations were infrequent and beliefs were assumed rather than discussed. My parents worked hard and became successful, and they helped others become successful too. They quietly served others, assisted people behind the scenes, and extended support to those in need without seeking recognition. They consistently embodied the principles of personal responsibility, moderation, and humility in their daily interactions and decision-making. And they always voted Republican. Because “we’re Republicans.”

Ours was also a family of faith, steeped in the United Methodist branch of the sprawling Christian family tree, predicated on the life and teachings of Jesus. We were in church every Sunday, and heard the gospel stories of grace, forgiveness, inclusion, compassion, and generosity. We sang the great hymns that declare that divine love is the beginning and the end, the all and the only.

I still believe this right down to my bones, that love - divine love - for all of creation, supersedes every other loyalty.

I experienced cognitive dissonance long before I knew what it meant.

John Kennedy was assassinated when I was in first grade. School dismissed early and I remember watching my mother cry in front of the television. Two years later, it was Malcom X and five years after that, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr, and Bobby Kennedy were gunned down.

The dark nuances of power, and particularly white patriarchy and nationalism, were vague to me then. But I knew that the narrative of a “Christian” America and the gospel of Jesus Christ were not the same story.

In August of 1974, I watched Richard Nixon resign. My skepticism grew.

In 1976, I cast my first vote in a presidential election, and I voted for Jimmy Carter. My father shook his head and chalked it up to naivete and immaturity.

I’m neither naive nor immature.

Jesus spoke clearly about how to live and how to love, and he was very specific about how we treat other people:

³¹ “When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. ³² All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. ³³ He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.

³⁴ “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. ³⁵ For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, ³⁶ I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

³⁷ “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? ³⁸ When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? ³⁹ When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’

⁴⁰ “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’

⁴¹ “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. ⁴² For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, ⁴³ I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’

⁴⁴ “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’

⁴⁵ “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’

⁴⁶ “Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”

~ Matthew 25:31-46, New International Version

My commitment to divine love dictates the way I vote. Not the other way around.

I don’t always vote a straight ticket. I probably don’t always study all the issues enough. But I think carefully, and deeply and I’m guessing you do too.

And I do believe that when nothing else is sure, this is true: “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. And the greatest of these is love.” (I Corinthians 13:13)

Love, not party loyalty.

Love, not the economy.

Love, not personal power or privilege.

You may or may not ascribe to a faith tradition, and you may or may not make love your north star at the ballot box. You get to choose. We all get to choose.

 "America is an idea." ~ Bono, U2

Not a place, not a geopolitical superpower, but an idea. The content of that idea? It's an idea that, according to Bono, "suggests a new beginning, a fresh start." That sounds an awful lot like grace, which sounds an awful lot like the good news of the gospel, which looks and sounds like love.

If you’re committed to that idea of America, if you’re committed to being the beacon on the hill, and the light in the darkness, and a more perfect union, and justice for all, I hope you’ll choose divine love as your north star.

If you are a person of faith, I hope you’ll choose the way of love.

And no matter what, on November 5, I hope we’ll still choose the way of love.

This election will not only be a referendum on democracy, but it will be – for people who try to live and love like Jesus – a referendum on our commitment to the gospel of love.

I apologize for being silent for too long.

I apologize for failing to disagree openly and publicly with people and policies that work to keep people down instead of lifting people up.

If you’ve felt unheard, unseen, or unsupported because of my silence, I am so sorry.

If you’ve wondered if you’re alone in this hard season, I’m deeply sorry.

Please know, you are loved. The God of love loves you.